Yvette Seifert Hirth
"Dis, dat, and de uddah"


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The Difference Between Men and Women Taking A Shower

How to Shower Like a Woman


  • Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
  • Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
  • Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- make mental note to do more sit-ups.
  • Get in the shower.  Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
  • Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
  • Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
  • Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil.  Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
  • Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
  • Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
  • Rinse conditioner off hair.
  • Shave armpits and legs.
  • Turn off shower.
  • Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.  Spray mold spots with Tilex.
  • Get out of shower.  Dry with towel the size of a small country.  Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
  • Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
  • Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.


How to Shower Like a Man

  • Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
  • Walk naked to the bathroom.  If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
  • Look at your manly physique in the mirror.  Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
  • Get in the shower.
  • Wash your face.
  • Wash your armpits.
  • Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
  • Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
  • Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
  • Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
  • Shampoo your hair.
  • Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
  • Pee.
  • Rinse off and get out of shower.
  • Partially dry off.  Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
  • Admire wiener size in mirror again.
  • Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
  • Return to bedroom with towel around your waist.  If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
  • Throw wet towel on bed.


Copyright / Marque Déposée  2014/11/01@15:31:00 UTC, Yvette Seifert Hirth
All rights reserved under the Berne and Paris copyright conventions - Reproduction prohibited
Tous les droits d´auteur réservé au dessous des regles des conventions de Berne et de Paris - Réproduction interdit